1.来点搞笑的英文谚语啊 最好不是直译的

Better be the head of a dog than the tail of a lion. 宁做鸡头，不做凤尾。

The foremost dog catches the hare. 早起的鸟儿有虫吃。 Every potter praises his own pot. 老王卖瓜，自卖自夸。

The fox preys farthest from home. 兔子不吃窝边草。 The proof of the pudding is in the eating. 要知道梨子的滋味，最好是亲口尝一尝。

One swallow does not make a summer. 一花独放不是春。 One drop of poison infects the whole tun of wine. 一颗老鼠屎坏了一锅粥。

Set a fox to keep one's geese. 引狼入室。 What do you expect from a pig but a grunt？ 狗嘴里吐不出象牙。

2.搞笑英语小说和英语谚语

英语小说

傲慢与偏见 简.奥斯丁

简·爱 夏绿蒂.勃朗特

项链

欧叶妮.格朗台 巴尔扎克

死魂灵 果戈理

变形记 卡夫卡

变色龙

绿野仙踪 莱弗兰.鲍姆

麦琪的礼物 欧.亨利

英语小故事

A fourth-grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson on logic.

"Here is the situation," she said. "a man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river, fishing. He loses his balance, falls in, and begins splashing and yellin

g for help. His wife hears the commotion, knows that he can't swim, and runs down to the bank. Why do you think she ran to the bank?"

A girl raised her hand and asked, "to draw out all of his savings?"

翻译：小学四年级的教师正在给学生们上一堂逻辑课。她举了这么一个例子：“有这样一种情况，一个男人在河中心的船上钓鱼，突然失去重心掉进了水里。于是他开始挣扎并喊救命。他的妻子听到了他的喊声，知道他并不会游泳，所以她就急忙跑向河岸。谁能告诉我这是为什么？” 一个女生举手答道，“是不是去取他的存款？”

3.中文搞笑英语翻译

1.we two who and who?

咱俩谁跟谁阿

??

2.how are you ? how old are you?

怎么是你，怎么老是你？

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3.you have seed I will give you some color to see see, brothers ! together up !

你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上！

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4.as far as you go to die

有多远，死多远！！！！

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5.hello everybody!if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,go home!!

有事起奏，无事退朝

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6.you me you me

彼此彼此

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7.You Give Me Stop!!

你给我站住！

8.know is know noknow is noknow

知之为知之，不知为不知…

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9.WATCH SISTER

表妹

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10.dragon born dragon,chicken born chicken,mouse''son can make hole！！龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子会打洞！

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11..I give you face you don't wanna face,you lose you face ,I turn my face

给你脸你不要脸，你丢脸，我翻脸

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12.one car comeone car go ,two car pengpeng,people die

车祸现场描述

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13.heart flower angry open

心花怒放

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14.go past no mistake past

走过路过，不要错过

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15.小明：I am sorry!

老外：I am sorry too!

小明：I am sorry three!

老外：What are you sorry for?

小明：I am sorry five!

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16.If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I haveone!

要钱没有，要命一条

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17.I call Li old big. toyear 25.

我叫李老大，今年25。

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18.you have two down son

你有两下子。

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19.好好学习，天天向上：

good good study,day day up!

好不容易给找的，希望采纳啊呵呵

4.求英语笑话,要好笑的；带英语格言；英语谚语,英语歇后语 60

When I was 28,I was teaching English to high school freshmen in a the faculty and staff were allowed to dress down.

One of those days,I donned a sweatshirt and slacks.A student camein and his eyes widened.

″Wow！″heexclaimed.″You should wear clothes like that everyday.You look twenty,maybe even thirty years younger！″

28岁那年，我在一所高中教一年级学生英语。这所学校允许教职员工有时不必穿得那么正式。

一天，我穿了一件运动衫和一条休闲裤。一个学生进来看见后，瞪大了眼睛。

“哇哦！”他大呼小叫地说：“你该天天这么穿。你看上去足足年轻了20岁，甚至30岁呢！”

5.搞笑英语小说和英语谚语

Reading enriches the mind.开卷有益。

Reading is to the mind while exercise to the body.读书健脑，运动强身。 Respect yourself, or no one else will respect you.要人尊敬，必须自重。

Rome is not built in a day.冰冻三尺，非一日之寒。 Saying is one thing and doing another.言行不一。

Seeing is believing.眼见为实。 Seek the truth from facts.实事求是。

Send a wise man on an errand, and say nothing to him.智者当差，不用交代。 Set a thief to catch a thief.以贼捉贼。

Short accounts make long friends.好朋友勤算账。 Something is better than nothing.聊胜于无。

Soon learn, soon forgotten.学得快，忘得快。 Soon ripe, soon rotten.熟得快，烂得快。

Speech is silver, silence is gold.能言是银，沉默是金。 Still water run deep.静水常深。

Strike the iron while it is hot.趁热打铁。 Success belongs to the persevering.坚持就是胜利。

Take things as they come.既来之，则安之。 Talking mends no holes.空谈无补。

Talk of the devil and he will appear.说曹操，曹操就到。 Tall trees catch much wind.树大招风。

Teach others by your example.躬亲示范。 The best hearts are always the bravest.无私者无畏。

The best man stumbles.伟人也有犯错时。 The cat shuts its eyes when stealing.掩耳盗铃。

The danger past and God forgotten.过河拆桥。 The darkest hour is nearest the dawn.黎明前的黑暗。

The darkest place is under the candlestick.烛台底下最暗。 The devil knows many things because he is old.老马识途。

The devil sometimes speaks the truth.魔鬼有时也会说真话。 The die is cast.木已成舟。

The early bird catches the worm.早起的鸟儿有虫吃。 The end justifies the means.只要目的正当，可以不择手段。

The end makes all equal.死亡面前，人人平等。 The eye is bigger than the belly.贪多嚼不烂。

The farthest way about is the nearest way home.抄近路反而绕远路。 The finest diamond must be cut.玉不琢，不成器。

The fire is the test of gold, adversity of strong man.烈火验真金，艰难磨意志。 The first step is the only difficulty.迈出第一步是最艰难的。

The fox knew too much, that's how he lost his tail.机关算尽太聪明，反误了卿卿性命。 The fox preys farthest from home.兔子不吃窝边草。

The frog in the well knows nothing of the great ocean.坐井观天。 The grass is greener on the other side.这山望着那山高。

The greatest talkers are always least doers.语言的巨人总是行动的矮子。 The higher up, the greater the fall.爬得高，摔得惨。

The leopard cannot change its spots.本性难移。 The more noble, the more humble.人越高尚，越谦虚。

The more wit, the less courage.初生牛犊不怕虎。 The outsider sees the most of the game.旁观者清。

The pen is mightier than the sword.笔能杀人。 The pot calls the kettle black.五十步笑百步。

There are spots in the sun.太阳也有黑点。 There are two sides to every question.问题皆有两面。

There is a skeleton in the cupboard.家家有本难念的经。 There is kindness to be found everywhere.人间处处有温情。

There is no general rule without some exception.任何法规均有例外。 There is no medicine against death.没有长生不老药。

There is no place like home.金窝银窝不如咱的狗窝。 There is no royal road to learning.书山有路勤为径，学海无涯苦作舟。

The style is the man.字如其人。 The tongue is not steel, yet it cuts.人言可畏。

The water that bears the boat is the same that swallows it up.水能载舟，亦能覆舟。 The wise man knows he knows nothing, the fool thinks he knows all.清者自清，浊者自浊。

The wolf has a winning game when the shepherds quarrel.螳螂捕蝉，黄雀在后。 The world is a ladder for some to go up and others to go down.世界如阶梯，有人上有人下。

The world is but a little place, after all.海内存知己，天涯若比邻。 Think twice before you do.三思而后行。

Things at the worst will mend.否极泰来。 Time and tide wait for no man.时不我待。

Time cures all things.时间是医治一切创伤的良药。 Time flies.光阴似箭。

Time is money.时间就是金钱。 Time lost cannot be won again.时光流逝，不可复得。

Time past cannot be called back again.时间不能倒流。 Time tries all.路遥知马力，日久见人心。

Tit for tat is fair play.人不犯我，我不犯人；人若犯我，我必犯人。 To err is human.人非圣贤，孰能无过。

To know everything is to know nothing.什么都知道，一如什么都不知道。 To know oneself is true progress.人贵有自知之明。

Tomorrow never comes.我生待明日，万事成蹉跎。 Too much familiarity breeds contempt.过分熟悉会使人互不服气。

Too much knowledge makes the head bald.学问太多催人老。 Too much liberty spills all.自由放任，一事无成。

Too much praise is a burden.过多夸奖，反成负担。 To save time is to lengthen life.节约时间就是延长生命。

Touch pitch, and you will be defil。

6.英语谚语求一些有趣的谚语,

An old dog cannot learn new trick.老狗学不出新把戏.·Barking dogs seldom bit.吠犬不咬人.·Every dog has his da.谁都有得意的时候.·Give a dog a bad name and hang hi.众口铄金，积毁销骨.·Let sleeping dogs lie.别惹麻烦.·Love me,love my dog.爱屋及乌.·Two dogs strive for a bone,and a third runs away with it.鹬蚌相争，渔翁得利.·Dogs wave their tails not so much in,love to you as your bread.狗摇尾巴，爱的是你的面包.·He that lies down (sleeps) with dogs must rise up with fleas.与恶人交终会变恶；近朱者赤，近墨者黑.·The cat and dog may kiss,yet are none the better friends.猫狗虽相吻，总难成好友.·An old dog bites sore.老狗咬人咬得狠.·Beware of a silent dog and still water.哑狗和静水，二者都得防.·Barking dogs seldom bite.爱吠的狗不咬人.·A dog will not howl if you beat him with a bone.肉骨头打狗狗不叫.·Dogs that bark at a distance bite not at hand.远处狗就叫，近身不会咬.·A handful of common sense is worth a bushel of learning.少量的常识，当得大量的学问.·A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.双鸟在林，不如一鸟在手；十赊不如一现.·He measures another's corn by his own bushel.用自己的标准衡量别人；以己度人.Every advantage has its disadvantag.有利必有弊.·Everybody's business is nobody's busines.人人负责，等于没人负责.·Every day is not Sunda.好景不常在.·Every dog has his da.谁都有得意的时候.·Every door may be shut,but death's doo.人生在世，唯死难逃.·Every heart has its own sorro.各人有各人的苦恼.·Every little helps a mickl.聚沙成塔，集腋成裘.·Every man for himself,and the devil takes the hindmos.人不为己，天诛地灭.·Every man has his fault.金无足赤，人无完人.·Every man has his hobbyhors.萝卜青菜，各有所爱.·Every man has his weak sid.人人都有弱点.·Every man is the architect of his own fortun.自己的命运自己掌握.·Every minute count.分秒必争.·Every mother's child is handsom.孩子是自己的好.·Every potter praises hit po.王婆卖瓜，自卖自夸.。