求雅思剑桥9的test1大作文范文的翻译

Children's education has long been our concern since Plato once uttered, "Education is where a country should start at." However, it is still a controversial issue after all these years among people who are particularly concerned about it. Some people believe that it is parents' responsibility to cultivate their kids to be fully aware of what a social being should look like; others, whereas, argue that schools should take over this for the ultimate goal. In this essay, I would put this issue in question and further analyse both sides before presenting my personal perspective.

On one hand, parents, as the first touchers of their kids, should tell them how to differentiate right from wrong. Given the time parents spend with their kids, they can be more likely to observe everyday change of their children. As a result of this, they are accountable for how their children normally behave in reality. More importantly, considering the fact that people according to their social being are usually placed into diverse norms, parents, as a family, as a part of community and as individuals in the society, should appropriately behave in action so as to deliver a message to their kids in which what should be respected and cherished in lives is highly highlighted.

On the other hand, academic institutions should take the responsibility for educating students to be entirely ready to enter the society. After leaving parents for schools, kids almost devote their most prime time at schools with their peels, their friends and their teachers; therefore, schools ought to put much emphasis on their growth as a person. Consequently, students could learn what they cannot acquire from home, such as communicative skills, understanding of various cultures etc.

帮忙修改雅思小作文,顺便请指点指点

我想说，楼上的评论不准确。

你的字数192，没超200就不算多，雅思考官的范文也有到这个字数的。其次，你的观点很有见地，而且表达很准确。

所以保守估计至少有7分。有小的语法错误，但不影响表达。

比如第一段， in the next 20 years，这句话有点冗长，建议拆两句，比较推荐用英式拼写（虽然无所谓，但考官都是英国的，他们看着别扭）你第三段next开头用的没有问题还有，非限制性定语从句用的有点多，就是你那个which，换个句型哈。注意一下你标点的使用，漏了几个逗号。

我很喜欢你的语言风格，很像考官的范文。还是在大作文上多下点功夫吧看好你，加油。

剑桥雅思9里面的test4大作文,就是说现在很多语言在消失,有些人认

雅思作文任务完成度只占四分之一的成绩，而且一般而言你写啥观点都行，只要你能说通。所以正反都行，我习惯是写冷观点，和别人不一样，容易上分。不过具体看个人

我把我写作思路搬上来吧，你借鉴下

先说many people think this tendency will undermine the diversity of language seriously,yet I would state my objection to this issue after analyzing the following reasons.

第一段写the preservation of these rare language will waste plenty of funds which should be used in many other fields contributing to society.

然后写the disappearance of these language will remarkably benifit our daily communication.

第三段我喜欢先列反方观点然后反驳，some people may say the diversity of language is a sigificant part of our culture,however,the importance of it is especially exaggerated.

雅思写作主要还是语法单词架构，观点不能说不重要，但不必看的太重，真想不出来可以用网上的万能观点，联系经济社会教育等常见话题展开

雅思小作文批改（剑5test1）

The graph illustrates the dramatic comparison of the population proportion aged 65 and over from year 1940 to 2040 in three countries.

In Japan, it's population proportion started in the year of 1940 at a tendency of going from 5% to approximate 3% in 1960, followed by a stable trend before restarting to the original level in year 2000.

In view of Sweden and USA, which both countries demonstrate a constantly increasing movement of the population, started itself from 7% and 9% to 16% and 14% respectively during the same period as Japan.

It is worth mention that the expected proportions in three countries, especially Japan are blessed with a noticeable rising of population, which raised sharply to 27% over the last two decades. As to the other countries, Sweden and USA have all experienced a moderate increase in population by hitting to 25% and 24% each, although Sweden suffered from a little turbulence in years from 2000 to 2020.

楼主英文水平很好，接近西方的结构写作，但语法稍微注意一下，有个别词汇还是要了解一下运用的方法，（英文同义单词很多，但写作时每个都有不同的用途）。还有尽量不要写数字，像 3 countries 要写成 three countries 看起来会比较正式一点。

我尽量改的都改了，也不会是完全对，只给LZ一个参考。

雅思剑5test1小作文 求评价

The line graph describes some data about the percentage

=》是不是可以改成 The line graph describes the percentage。

aged 65 and over

=》aged 65 and older ?

As can be seen from this line graph,there is an increasing trend in the number of old people in three countries.More precisely,the percentage of population went up gradually from 9% in 1940 to 15% in 1982 and it will remain stable at 14% in 2018（那个国家？）.After that（去掉？），the proportion of population aged 65 and over is expected to reach 23% in 2040.Similarly（跟什么说similarly，前后说的好像不一样） ，the proportion of population age 65and over in Sweden accounted for 7% in 1940 to 26% in 2040（对将来数据的预测，时态是否不对？）.While,the percentage of population aged 65 and over in USA remained steady at 5% by the end of 2008,After that, there is a substantial surge and occupies at 27% in 2040（对将来数据的预测，时态是否不对？）.

Therefore,it shows that the percentage of 65+ people are soring moderately in the next three decades.（ 未来三年应该是数据预测，不是shows吧。。。，另外，soring moderately，适度的飙升？有点矛盾？）

soring => soaring

帮我改一下这个雅思小作文是剑5 test1的小作文

The graph illustrates changes in the proportion of the population aged 65 and over form 1940 to 2040 in Japan, Sweden, and USA. （介词in用的没错，但要加上逗号。）

In 1940,JAPAN was the least in amount of population aged over 65,which was 5%. While the American population was the most proportion,which was double of Japanese about 9%,furthermore,Swiss population was 7% in between.

---In 1940, Japan was the one which has the least amount of population aged 65 and over(5%), while America consists of the largest proportion, which amounts to 9%, doubling that of Japan.

During 100-year period,proportion of Swiss and American had a upward trend,which increased to 25% and 27% respectively.but there was a slight decline in the number of Swiss population from 2010 to 2030.

However,the proportion of Japanese population witnessed a downward trend from 1940 to 1990,which reached the bottom (about 3%), after which, we can see a highly upward trend that the population increased to 27% in 2040.Furthermore, it even overtook Swiss and America in 2030.

Overall,the graph shows the proportion of three country's population aged 65 and over has increased dramatically in 100 years.

剑7 test1 小作文 求修改

The graphic information in the table shows how the consumers spend their money between different items, in the following five countries by 2002: Ireland, Italy, Spain, Sweden and Turkey.

According to the table, most of the people in Ireland and Turkey were more likely to spend their money on food, drinks and tobacco. For Ireland and Turkey, the percentage of the money spend were 28.91% and 32.14%, but the other three countries in comparison had a percentage that was relatively low, which was at an average of 17% or so. However, the consumer expenditure for clothing and footwear in Italy were the highest, which was around 9.00%. Still, there's no doubt that Spain was the country with the lowest percentage for national consumer expenditure of leisure and education that was only 1.98%; while Turkey, was more than twice of what Spain had. Yet, the cost for leisure and education in Ireland, Italy and Sweden, according to the data, were at 2.21%, 3.2% and 3.22%.

In conclusion, consumers in Turkey were preferred to pour their money into both Food/Drinks/Tobacco and Leisure/Education, as against the highest consumer expenditure in other Europe countries was Food/Drinks/Tobacco.

大多数的用词方法改了一下，顺序也稍微换了一下，这样读起来比较顺口，还有你那个Food/Drinks/Tobacco和Leisure/Education，在这边基本上是不用“/”来划分的，就直接用逗号，而且也不要大写。

你最后一段我没看懂你想说什么，所以就没改了，。