求大神改一改我的雅思作文,剑桥7t1的小作文

This table illustrates the [data](normally we say illustrate the changes or the situation, or show you the data )of consumers spending on various items in [the following five countries, ](omit them!)Ireland, Italy,Spain, Sweden and Turkey in 2002.According to the table, it's obvious that Irelandand and(!)Turkey spent(I'd rather use account for) the [most](highest) percentage of money, [while](with) 28.91% for Ireland and 32.14% for Turkey, on food, drinks and tobacco. The other 3 countries had [similar](nearly even. Here similar will raise confusion.) percentage at an average of nearly 17%, which is far lower than (that of) the previous countries. Then in the item of clothing and footwear Italy stood out with a 9%and the rest of the countries range from 5% to 7%. [Different from](in contrast with) the former 2items, [countries](the countries') spending didn't vary too much from each other in the item of leisure and education. Italy went to 4.35% and Spain sit at 1.98%.[Every country has its unique way of life](It's the people not the country that have their way of life. I'd rather say People in different countries have different life styles.). We can judge them only through consumers spending[, but](.But) it may be better if [we](they) spend more money on education and leisure.注：中括号里的内容是觉得有问题的部分，之后括号内的内容是给出的替换.时间关系只能说这么多了，希望能帮到你.。

剑桥雅思7test1表格作文,希望高手予以批改,20分不多,但保证送出

The data indicates that consumer spending on different items from five different countries in 2002,including Ireland,Italy,Spain,Sweden,and Turkey.The first section consists of Food,Drinks,and Tobacco.Specially,Turkey is accounted in 32.14% and Turkey spends more money on Food,Drinks,Tocbacco than other countries.The statistics from Italy,Spain,and Sweden were similar in the first section.Accroding to the data,the second section is made up of Clothing and Footwear.9% from Italy is the highest percentage and the lowest percentage is Sweden.The third section is Leisure and Education.The percentage of Italy and Sweden are 3.20% and 3.22%.Turkey spends money on Leisure and Education is 4.35% which is the highest percentage in the third section.As the table shown,most people would like to spend more money on Food,Drinks,and Tobacco and spend less money on Leisure and Education.修改完毕！请LZ给分吧 ⊙﹏⊙。

我30号考雅思,很担心小作文,写了一篇剑桥雅思7上的,考过的前

1. 请检查拼写和谓语动词搭配2. 文章结构很好，个别句子可删减3. 过去的数据用过去时，检查时态4. 更多体现饼图percentage的特征5. 更多的比较，不是只做数据陈列6. 最好注意英式拼写与美式拼写的不同以下是修改过的，不一定全对。

我也看过范文，觉得语言和写作风格能学习，但是逻辑结构每个人不一样。最重要是多练习怎么安排数据的分析，做到有条理却不需要面面俱到，语言不用很复杂都可以。

修改后共219，考场上还是容易写够的。The following charts illustrate the fuel sources contain in units of electricity for two countries – Australia and France. Both of which were, beyond doubt, the total productions of electricity climbed up dramatically from 1980 to 2000. Specifically, the figure of Australia increased from 100 to 170 units, and for France, it showed a double growth from 90 to 180 units.In Australia, by the year 1980, coal made a great contribution to the fuel production with 50%, and it kept the leading position in 2000, holding approximately 75%. Similarly, the hydro power increased slightly from 20 to 36 units. While both natural gas and oil experienced declines from 20 and 10 units to only 2 units respectively.In comparison of France, however, the hydro power dropped from 5 to 2 units being the minor source, whilst the oil ascended from 20 to 25 units. It is notable that coal and natural gas were the main electricity sources in 1980, with the same figure of 25%. Specially, the nuclear power, which was not used at all in Australia, had a steady raise from 15 to 126 units of electricity, ranking the first among all elements.Overall, it is clear that by 2000 these two countries relied on different principal fuel sources: Australia relied on coal and France relied on nuclear power.。

剑桥雅思全真试题4 第一篇小作文范文

The table gives a breakdown of the different types of family who were living in poverty in Australia in 1999.

On average, 11% of all households, comprising almost two million people, were in this position. However, those consisting of only one parent or a single adult had almost double this proportion of poor people, with 21% and 19% respectively.

Couples generally tended to be better off, with lower poverty levels for couples without children (7%) than those with children (12%). It is noticeable that for both types of household with children, a higher than average proportion were living in poverty at this time.

older people were generally less likely to be poor, though once again the trend favoured elderly couples (only 4%) rather than single elderly people (6%).

Overall the table suggests that households of single asults and those with children were more likely to be living in poverty than those consisting of couples.

T0T是不是这个，，累死我了

谁写过雅思剑7tast4大作文？？跪求！

IELTS剑桥雅思剑4剑5剑6剑7内容： 需要说明是：剑一到剑六是按出版时间命名的，剑一最早，剑六最新，至于剑七稍后介绍。

剑一：模拟题，且出版太老，基本无实际指导意义。 剑二：真题，但体型比较老，如听力长句填空这样的题型已经不考，但是仍然有很多经典题型，可以不买，但如果准备时间长推荐购买。

剑三至剑四：真题，题型基本对于雅思考试有所指导。 剑五至剑六：真题，切题型最新，有很强的指导意义，认真练习研究。

剑七：并非真的是剑桥大学ESOL考试委员会编着，而是环球雅思，最多算是模拟指导书，千万别当真题花太多时间研究。 。

剑7雅思英语作文,高分求修改意见,不剩感激

请问下你这篇文章准备拿多少分，现在这个答案从任何角度来看都足够8分水平，应该已经足够了吧简单提些小意见，仅供参考，有些纯粹是个人说话习惯，人跟人也有分别，大可看看而已- - -优点1.辞藻丰富，用词准确2.开场白，两方论点，总结，条理清晰明了3.句法严禁，语法普遍准确缺点1.某些地方仍然有中式思维的残留，只挑一个例子来说We, human beings, have mercy on these kinds of crimes and everyone could understand and allow certain variations existing. allow certain variations existing明显是“允许一些变通存在”的直翻，（个人认为）更通顺的写法应为We, human beings, SHOULD have mercy on these kinds of crimes. We SHOULD show our understanding(s) and allow the existence(s) of certain variations.2.语法错误The ultimate objective that making the society better off as a whole, should be reminded all the time. The ultimate objective that makes (aims to make) the society better as a whole, should be reminded at all time.better of个人觉得不应该用在这种语境里吧，只是个感觉，请查有关文章对比用法3.显示出一些小小的文章个性遵守文章结构当然会为考官带来不少的方便，但以你的水平来看，足以在此基础上显示一些个人的才华，你的能力应该绰绰有余，充分的表现下自己么，呵呵开场白，放松一些，不需要完全转换原题，显得会有些生硬，自然点就好两方论点比重，既然反方有两个例子，正方（fairness方）不能什么都没有。

这个题当然有自己的倾向，但文章要自己掌握住有自己的想法，完全可以在总结里面提出，In my own opinion， 两句话，之后结尾4.正反都有自己的优缺点，要支持的同时简单提一句反驳，但不要和另一方论点雷同- - -最后祝考试顺利，个人认为完全不必要把精力放在写作上了，把其他部分拉倒8分水平就好了。

这个是剑桥7 test4 的小作文,请大家帮忙改一下,谢谢啦！！

The given pie charts illustrate unites of electricity production by fuel score (coal, oil, natural gas, hydro power and nuclear power) in Australia and France in 1980 and 2000.这里没能完全描述出图表的主要特征。

且首段过于简单，记住首段是面子，一定要写的漂亮。As can be seen from these charts, the units of electricity by different categories of fuel were various in two countries in the different years. Specifically, in 1980, approximately half of the electricity units were produced by coal ,which shared the same production with natural gas (only 25 units) in France. The electricity units/delete production by natural gas were 20 units in Australia. In terms of//用词不准确，和后面的半句意义一样，整句就是重复累赘，production by oil and hydro power , the units of electricity produced by hydro power were 20 units, which were four times /加greater/ than those in France, however, only 10 units of electricity were made/generated by oil in Australia, which were half of those in France. To our surprise , nuclear power made 15 units of electricity in France and none of any/the others contributed /as much to the electricity/power supply in France.In 2002, the majority of//不能这样用 electricity was produce/d by coal ( 130 units) in Australia, which still made the same quantity /units/删掉 （25 units） in France. Clearly, the dominant production of electricity was by nuclear power in France with the amount of 126 units. Natural gas and oil produced very little//口语化，书面语少用very// electricity (only 2 units) in Australia. The France had the/a similar quantity by natural gas and hydro power.Overall, these figures lead us to /the/ conclusion that coal is the major source to produce electricity in Australia while nuclear power played a significant role in production of electricity in France.我一直不知道小作文要怎么才能进步，每次都会超时，用大概25分钟才能写完，而且字数都超很多（超过200）。

请各位指导一下我，该怎么在不到一个月的时间内提高小作文。如何避免在把信息点都描述清楚后字数不会超。

万分感谢！！估计你小作文超时的原因有二，第一，不是很熟悉图表作文的套话，或者说写作模板准备不够，第二，对小作文的要求理解不到位，当然也有可能是你对如何抓住图表的main features的技巧掌握的还不娴熟。这也就导致你时间花的过多，且写出来的东西就像我们的伟大祖国一样，大而漏洞百出问题多多。

小作文就是要求短小精悍，150词能解决就不需要200或更多。多了反而更容易出错，所谓言多必失。

针对这样的问题，你可以首先多看些小作文的范文，掌握一些通用的结构和规律，在练习中提炼你自己的常用句型和模板，考试时能做到提笔就写拿来就用。再就是小作文要求得很清楚，抓住图表的主要特征进行描述就好，无需太过在意次要细节。

每个图表或者数据都是在讲一个问题，你要看出这个问题就好了，不需要面面俱到的。这篇文章你去对照一下后面的范文就知道其实要拿高分，完全不需要描述所有的信息点。

这个文章抓住电力增长很快，同时澳洲主要靠煤，法国主要靠核能这两个点就好了。如果你不确定是不是看图分析能力还不够的话，你可以先用中文写写小作文，或者把自己的小作文翻译成中文，然后给你的父母同学朋友看看，让他们评价一下你的文章在抛开语言的前提下是否完成了描述图表主要特征的任务。

如果没有，那你首先要考虑提高看图能力。相信在你理解了小作文的得分点和技巧后，会很快上手的。

还是那句话，雅思一点都不可怕，加油。